29th January 1935 - Terrick to Mary

2 Earl's Court Square
S.W. 5

29th January 1935


My darling Mary Pleasant,

Thank you for your very, very nice letter.  It had its due effect.  

How did Matron's fiancé get £6 a week?  That is the important question to ask.  Perhaps he got a degree at the School of Economics.  The railways pay very badly so he must be a star of some sort.  I suppose they have some private income of their own or they couldn't get married on only £6 a week.

The "Family Feud" was a joke of Renny's.  Does that complaint business still worry your mother?  I am sure Renny has forgotten about it long ago; except that he was rather taken aback at your mother bringing it up again in the middle of the party.  I'll try & let her know that he never thought about it again, when I come down with her tomorrow.  Unfortunately I may only succeed in making things worse because I have got something I must tell her about (not complain about). Unfortunately she takes everything as a complaint.

If you found any reasons to be lucky at my wanting to marry you, they must have been peculiar ones.  I can only think of one: because you want to marry me.

I'll get you Laburnam Grove for Friday if that will do.

Nothing from Snowball.  He may be waiting till he can tell me personally.  He will be back in a day or two.  Anyhow I'll write and remind him.
_______________________________

Darling, I started this letter before the lecture meaning to go on afterwards.  I expected to get back at 10.30, but they couldn't get the lantern out of a locked cupboard, so it is now 11.30.  Ten minutes to last post.

It's no good trying to measure how much I love you.  It's like a snow ball, every day it collects more of itself.

All of it.

Terrick.

28th January 1935 - Mary to Terrick

Dunally Lodge

O.V.S.

Monday 8.45


My very dearest dear,

I seem to spend my days telling you things that I vow to keep to myself.  I suppose everybody goes through the complexes of feelings that I go through at some time in their existence - but it's only me that makes a fuss about mine.  I feel that occasionally you must get very sick and tired of my effusions.

I talked to Matron for ¾ of an hour this afternoon.  She's only 22 and she's been engaged for a year and he's 25 - and she met him at the London School of Economics.  He had a good job in India but threw it up to stay here and got another on railways after only 2 days - she's known him 3 years in March and they're going to get married this summer now that she's given notice to Miss Cross, and she's going home next weekend to somewhere near Kings Lynn to make cushion covers and embroider sheets!!!  So there! - and heaps more! (I didn't do badly - did I?)

I came up in Andy's car this morning.  It went jolly well.  Mummy was a bit so-soy over the weekend because she happened to let out to Jill that Mr Hodson had told her Dudley was away with Mini at the cottage that time he was missing.  I think Jill's a bit cut up about it.  But apparently Mr H. is now going home from 41 and Mini is being instated as house-keeper-manager at a salary of £2 per week when she's got a husband and 3 sons at home in Hampstead - and Mummy has to pay to live and do exactly the same at No 2.  It all seems very queer to me.

I'm frightfully sorry about the "family feud" but I can't do anything because I think I'm a bit more on Mummy's side - but she's definitely coming home for the Easter hols at the beginning of April - so bear up. - (although, mind you, she's done more for the actual cleanliness and general well-being of the house than your old maid ever did!)

I told Mummy over the weekend why I specially thought I was lucky because you wanted to marry me.  The reasons were a bit peculiar, but she seemed to understand - and I've told you lots of times so there's no need to ask me again.

- Can you get me a copy of "Laburnum Grove" by Priestly from the B.D.L. Library? While there's life there's hope!

We've got a very nice new German girl from Potsdam (Oh? ...... Potsdam? ...... I know it well !!!) - we had a long German-English conversation this evening (she's learning English at the Poly.) - and I've specially memorised what "table" and "chair" is !!

- I'm just praying Inge will have me in August because I want to start my German lessons with you so badly.

*          *          *          *

(Latest news bulletin !!! Matron's fiancé has stepped straight into his job at £6 a week!!)

- I long for Wednesday - and even more for Friday because I shall be able to wake you up on Saturday morning - and I love you very very much - & I'm going to get exceptionally cold posting this - & couldn't you just send me a p.c. telling me just exactly how much you love me tomorrow? Because I want to measure it and see if its as much as last time.

Jeremiah sends his love too.

Yours always.

Mary Pleasant
                      xxx

21st January 1935 - Terrick to Mary

21st January 1935


Darling Mary

I have sent Miss Cross the translation.

How do you feel now, being back at work?

Paul and I had an amusing time this evening.  He was to give a lecture at Gordon & Gotch's Staff Club in Farringdon St and I was going to operate the lantern for him.  G & G had no lantern or screen so we had to take both, the first in a suitcase and the latter in a long narrow black box (Do you remember the screen at F.W.  Like that only bigger).  We had to walk down the street as if we were carrying a coffin, one holding one and the other following behind with the other.

We just got the screen into a taxi after a good deal of doubt about it from the driver who thought we should poke holes in his cover.  At last we arrived at G & G, & went up four floors in the lift to find that they had forgotten all about the lecture.  The staff manager was extraordinarily vague creature who fingered the lantern and slides as if he had never seen such things in his life.  In the end we came away.  We couldn't make the lift man hear our ring and couldn't do our coffin march down the stairs so I had to carry the screen down as best I could to the amazement of the staff who couldn't think what it could be.

When we got outside there were no taxis to be seen so we had to do our coffin march again into Ludgate Circus & up to Holborn with bus conductors and boys on bicycles making ribald remarks about "the body".

With a great many sighs of agony & boredom I have done my four pages of typing.  If only I can keep it up I shall finish the first act this week.

My darling, I love you very, very much and am looking forward tremendously to Wednesday & Thursday.

Hundreds of kisses.

Terrick.


I have left the original German letter out of Miss Cross's envelope.  Here it is.

21st January 1935 - Mary to Terrick

O.V.S.

Monday


Dear Terrick

Would you please translate this letter for Miss Cross and post it back this evening if possible.  Nobody here can do it - and as it's either about a new pupil or a student teacher it's rather important as school starts tomorrow.

Have lots to tell you already - but Miss X is looking at this.

Thank you so much - see you Wednesday.

Mary.

The 101st - written 13th January 1935 - Given by hand 20th January 1935 - Mary to Terrick

In Bed after Hot Bath

January 13th 1935


Being the 101st this should be inscribed in gold with a jewelled pen, wrapped around my heart, tied with the ribbon of Sincerity and sealed with the Seal of Faith; flung to the four winds, and, under the favourable guidance of Clotho, Lachesis, and Atropos, delivered into your hands' where my heart would whisper you all the things about myself I never knew - and you, in answer, would despatch me yours (as a temporary loan) enclosed in many plans, tied with the ribbon of Fulfilment, and sealed with the Seal of Nobility;  placed on the warm wind of Everlasting Hope, and borne to me by the Spirit of Confidence.  And for a single moment we should know each other with a perfect understanding - and be content, withal, in knowing - that we, together, might live to the end that all men live - and in the end be granted certainty that we have re-given to this life "good measure, pressed down and running over "with the part of ourselves that no other man can give."

*          *          *          *          *

Instead, it is a very ordinary love letter from me to you.  The love I use in loving you is different from anything I have ever heard of before.  It is new and strange and I do not understand it.  It isn't a flash of blinding and everlasting happiness - but more like something just being born, that nobody has ever seen before, but which I must learn about, until it becomes a part of me; and until I need fear it not more because I shall understand every little particle of it - I shall stand in the sun-shadow of a very old tree and smile gently at it because I know it is safe, because it has you and me to look after it for always.

Dear Heart, I love you as much as I have learnt how - please help me always - 

Your

Mary Pleasant

18th January 1935 - Terrick to Mary

2 Earl's Court Square

18th January 1935



Darling Mary, 

When Mummy was in town she asked me if I was worried about anything as I looked so worried.  I told her truthfully that life had never been better, but later I noticed myself looking serious.  I found it was because I was thinking absolutely about the same thing I had been thinking about a lot, and at the moment Mummy asked me if I was worried, namely: how on earth to earn enough to get married.  Marrying you has become a really pressing problem.  It is not something I should like to do and will do some day.  It is something that has got to be done by me as soon as possible, an urgent task set by God.

I love you so much that life is only half life without you always near.  It does not disturb me to think that after a few years the flame of love will get dimmer, because we simply couldn't live comfortably if it were always to be as hot and dazzling as it is now.

Your idea of love in man and in women is supported by Byron who said: 
     "Love is of man's life a thing apart. 'Tis woman's whole existence".

With great labour, interruptions etc I have churned out my four pages of "Edwy".  I know I shall never keep up the pace.

Re the Poly, I hear that Hawken wanted me to be his successor, but Elliott insisted that Stonelake ought to get it.  I may get it yet if I outshine him.  I don't know what he is like as a worker.

Renny is having a bath.  Lamb has gone to bed fed up because I won't come out and have a drink with him.

I must have a look for your 101st letter.  I think I have not filed it yet.  This morning's should be the 102nd.

A fellow called Gibbons is going to be rep at Grindlewald this year.  If you were out there with your mother for a time before I left the Poly he would keep an eye on you, he is a good chap.

I love you so much, darling.  If anything can make a prosperous citizen out of me it will be the urge to marry you.  I am not anywhere near worthy of you; but I am afraid I won't have any girl but the best, so I mustn't worry about it.

Now, darling, goodnight.  I shall see you about three hours after you get this.  Thank Heaven!

All my heart

Terrick
              XXXXX

17th January 1935 - Mary to Terrick

Dunally Lodge
Shepperton

Thursday
Tea-Time


Darling - I don't think this letter will be worth its 1½d - because all I can think of to tell you is what a terrific lot you mean to me - everywhere and every day - loving you seems to be growing into the biggest part of my life - I mustn't let it grow too big.

I keep on thinking of Grindlewald and your letter.  It would be wonderful.  Doing anything with you would be wonderful even if it didn't do all we hoped.

Mummy phoned this morning and I mentioned your lecture on Sunday evening to her.  But as Grannie's coming and will have to be taken home in the car about 10.00 it doesn't look as if we'd be able to have it. - and Mummy says if we've got visitors here I can't possibly go off and leave them - so altogether I feel as if I shall be very and outstandingly disagreeable next Sunday evening at about 7 p.m.  It'll be awful.

Also I'm calling for Mummy at Earls Ct. at about 11 on Saturday morning, I think , to be home in time for lunch - so it looks as if we'll miss you altogether.  But I'll phone you if Mummy suggests anything.

Life, at the moment, seems one hectic maze of trying to see you whenever I can, it isn't silly - it's just that when I'm with you I seem to get the maximum out of everything, so I can't help myself.

Loving, with a man, is part (however great a part) of his great living scheme - with a woman its "living" in the greatest sense of her word.  Don't say "Well it's all wrong for her to let it be" - because it was only just a thought that occurred to me.

Until Saturday

Yours with everything I have

Mary xxx

By the way, isn't it about time I once more saw your handsome handwriting on a fresh envelope?  Or would that upset the average 3 pages of typing?

I haven't had a letter from your for quite 3 WEEKS !!

15th January 1935 - Mary to Terrick

Sitting on the Steps

2.30 Tuesday

I should really be finishing off my skirt in the study - but the weather was too much for me so I just walked out.

It's the most perfect day of my holidays except that you're not here.  As long as God continues to make days like these - Spring sunshine on winter earth and bare, buddy trees - warm sniffy air, and aeroplanes and cocks and starlings making their several noises - I shall always think of you.  It's very funny - and I dare say there's a physcological explanation, but for ever and ever a lovely day will always make me think of places like Fort William and Shere and Wensley - and you in your new plus fours.

I wrote you a letter (a very special one, being the 101st) on Sunday evening - it was distinctly different from anything I've written before, but as, on reading it through on Monday morning, I couldn't decide whether it was absolute tripe - or what I'd meant to to be, an (being Monday morning) the balance being in favour of the former, I fortunately refrained from sending it.

Pam 'phoned to put off going to the dance with Jack this evening, so he says he won't go - that leaves just Jill and Renny out of our party  - a bit of a shock for poor Jean Dunbar.  Andy was going to take me to the pictures in Walton - but he's not coming down for his car until Saturday now.

Flip is in the throes of a bilious attack and is in bed looking ghastly - so I'm here all alone at the moment - as Jill started school today.

I'm coming up tomorrow - Mr Lingwood is playing bridge with Mummy in the evening so I'll stay up with you - if I shan't be in your way? (go on, make some nasty remark!)

Please, darling, you will come down next weekend, won't you?  as it's the last one in the holidays.  Perhaps I can meet you in Richmond at 1.30 - so we ahve the whole of Saturday afternoon and Sunday.

How did the lecture go?  Did you create the right impression? - And how did your mother like your room?  Has she gone home yet?

9th January 1935 - Mary to Terrick

Dunally

1.35 p.m.

Dear Terrick

Mr Hodson is bringing this up for me so that you get it directly you come in.  I phoned you yesterday - forgetting you would most probably be out with your Mother.  Will you come to a dance at the Kew Pavilion tomorrow - Thursday?  Mrs Vaughn has asked the 4 of us to go as her guests - you know - like the one we took a party to before.  I rather expect you'll look worried and say "Sorry, old thing, I really don't think I can because I'm going to one tonight - and another with you on Saturday  and I must see something of my mother and get some work done" - so I'm trying to keep my hopes from rising too high - but I thought the chance of a free evening with you when I didn't expect it was too good to waste by not asking.  We're coming up to Earls Court to change tomorrow evening - as Mummy & I are going to the Empire at 12.30.  Jack's coming too and we're all going down to Kew together.

How is Mrs FitzHugh? - Did you tell her about our idea?

Goodness me, this seems a very long week.  I'm not going out with Miss Olsson on Saturday so will it be all right if I still get to you about 4.30? - Or would you rather I left it until later? The last train leaves Waterloo at 12.05 - it's a bit of a nuisance isn't it?  Means leaving about 11.45.

Mervyn's just phoned to ask me to go to a dance with him this evening - so if you see Mummy just let her know will you?  Every time I ask her to ask you about coming to this Kew Dance she says "why not ask Mervyn?" - until I said "because I don't like him (which is a fib) and because I'd never ask anybody to go to a dance with me but Terrick" - So she'll be so pleased.

If you've got time to phone this evening will you do it before 7?

- All my love for ever

Hope you have a nice time this evening too.

Mary Pleasant.